My Dad passed away on April 8, 2010 in San Diego, California. He fought a hard fight against leukemia but once he had his spleen taken out on March 11th things went down hill very quickly. His leukemia went from chronic to acute and his spleen was full of cancer. Hospice came to help after he was released from the hospital and he lasted with their services for almost three
weeks.
We had the funeral on April 15 at their church in Poway and many relatives came that I have not seen for years. All four of us kids spoke at the services in Cali and Utah. Mom is holding up remarkably well and many relative's commented on how well she was looking! Kelsey and Rick came to San Diego for that service and we all went back to UTah for the memorial and burial with our
whole family. It was a beautiful day and Dad was buried at Wasatch Lawn with the Navy Honor guard giving Mom a flag from our President and with taps being played. It was very moving to have this done in honor of the service my Dad rendered our country.
I am grateful for the opportunity the funeral has given me to get be connected with my cousins again! Blessings, blessings....
Love this picture of Kurt and the honor guard with the hearst, as well.
The Bishop at the San Diego service made the comment that there were many "tender mercies" shown our family during these last few months of Dad's life. I'd like to share a few of the one's that I have noticed.
When I first heard of Dad breaking his hip I knew right away that the end for him would be near. It was almost an immediate confirmation to me... a "tender mercy" for me to have that knowledge that Dad's days were coming to a close.
Kelsey and I spending time with Mom & Dad in San Diego, helping them with things, taking Dad to his many doctor appointments, chemo treatments, transfusions of blood and platelets.
One of those visit's at Green Hospital at Torrey Pine's Dad had more energy and after his office visits he wanted to make sure Kelsey and I were able to check out some of the golfing that was going on at Torrey Pine's. Kurt was insanely jealous that we were able to see a little bit of this tournament. Dad stayed in the car while we checked out one of the fairways. After we did that for a bit we went back to the car where Dad told us he wanted to take us to lunch at one of his favorite Mexican restaurants in La Jolla (minutes away from the hospital). We had a great lunch with one of the best chile relleno's (sp?) I have ever eaten. This was to be Dad's last time eating Mexican or for that fact, going to a restaurant. He then made sure I had a few minutes in a Yarn Shop that I was anxious to check out and then his last trip to the beach. I have many fond memories of my Dad at the beach and to think this was his last time with me and his granddaughter, Kelsey.....such a "tender mercy".
Some special moment's with my Dad that really touched me were... one afternoon some of their friends, The Blackam's came to visit and talk with Dad. At the end of their conversation Mr. Blackam asked Dad if there was anything they could do for him. Anything at all.... He finally thought Dad may like a pie and Dad was very agreeable to that idea. But, instead of telling the Blackam's his favorite type of pie he told them Mom's favorite type....dutch apple. This was such a teaching moment to me as it showed Dad's true devotion to his sweetheart. It was the last pie he ever tasted on earth and to think that it was more important to him to please Mom more than himself was a lesson learned. A lesson for all of us....
Another day we had spent several hours in the hospital and Dad was up on the table waiting for some results and looked at me and said his biggest regret right then was that he was not able to serve Mom more at this time. I told him that it was okay and that he had spent years doting on Mom and it was time for her to serve him...what goes around come's around type of thought.
His devotion to his wife was so admirable and many people told me later what an example Dad was of true love and devotion. Tender mercy written all over those experiences.
After Dad's spleen removal things went down hill fast. He almost died a week after his surgery on Kelsey's 22nd birthday and the night of my 50th birthday party. But, he pulled through. He hung in there until we could gather around his hospital bed that next Monday night so we could have our last Family Night. He went around the room and told us of his love for each of us. And at the very end of our time together he counseled us to attend the temple and to serve others. Such a huge "tender mercy". How many people get the opportunity to talk to their children and express their love and testimony to them? Truly a blessing.
The next night I was there at his bed with his two sisters and my Mom. I read his patriarchal blessing and the three of them went down memory lane and shared some very tender memories of their childhood. I don't think there are three more faithful siblings in the world. What a blessing to have them as family. Such a "tender mercy".
Heavenly Father orchestrated the last day's of my Dad so perfectly. Those of you who know God know that His way's are perfect so how could we question His plan for us? He knew that my Mom was still Hoping that Dad would pull out of this disease. This cancer that ate away at my Dad till the very end.
Father in Heaven gave my Mom a few extra weeks with my Dad for her to know that it was Dad's time to end his journey here on earth. He was very weak and at the end was unable to communicate. But, Father let my Dad squeeze my Mom's hand at the very end while she kissed his forhead and told him that she would see him on the other side. What a true "tender mercy".
Both services were beautifully done and like I wrote before we were all able to speak and share our memories of our Dad and head of our family. He was an amazing man and like all of us had trials but always never doubted his Faith in our Savior, Jesus Christ. I was one lucky girl to have a Dad like him. As a young girl my hero was my Dad. He taught me about God and I always believed and loved my Father in Heaven because I had a Father on Earth that was very heavenly. He was faithful to the end and never gave up his Faith, even when things got tough.
The day after the funeral in San Diego Mom and I flew together to Salt Lake City. On the walk to the baggage claim Mom was being pushed in the wheel chair by a Delta employee and I happened to recognize and talk to Elder David Bednar. He is one of the Lord's apostles here on earth. Truly a "tender mercy" that I will never forget.
There were more "tender mercies" that I have not put down but hope you get a sense of the amazing journey our family has had these last few month's of Dad's journey here on earth.
